Category Archives: SDSU

Recap: Nebraska vs. SDSU – Room For Only One Jack

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After a week of speculation and controversy, it was good to see our boys in red back out on the field. For the most part, there was overwhelming support for Bo, as demonstrated by the standing ovation he received. I’m sure there were angry comments and sporadic boos, but I don’t count those because I don’t want them. Past girlfriends have said I have selective hearing, and I’ll be damned if I’m going to change that now. So now that the whole thing is behind us and the only reason we should ever talk about it again is that we found the tipster and he’s going to be thrown in to the stocks…lets play some football!

For some reason College GameDay Guest Picker Guy (a former defensive end for North Dakota State University and the Buffalo Bills) got a little cheeky  and predicted that the South Dakota State University Jackrabbits would upset Nebraska at home. Yeah, OK. YOU ARE FROM NORTH DAKOTA YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO HATE SOUTH DAKOTA AND WANT THEM TO GET SLAUGHTERED.

That guest picker was Phil Hansen. From what it seems, he knows his football, and he’s widely liked. But apparently he just really wanted to troll his alma mater.

Other people, who apparently didn’t know better, had their misconstrued hopes reaffirmed. “Who cares if he only knows NDSU football?! He makes me feel better about me hoping my team will win an impossible game today!” Apparently the allegiance to the Dakotas sweeping, and “North” and “South” are interchangeable. (It should also be noted that Hansen ran for the Minnesota Senate in 2012, so his opinions on anything Dakota are nothing but questionable.)

#notsmartbison

I got tired of the people coming down on Nebraska. It was hurting my heart. Other teams have had tough weeks and won. Other teams have shitty defense and they won. Other teams have lost their starting quarterback and put in the backup(s) and won. (Ahem, Ohio State).

So I spoke up:

And what do you know? THE STREAK IS BROKEN!!!! WE DIDN’T GO THREE-AND-OUT!! It seems I need to make more predictions. It took only four plays (and one penalty) to score!

Then we kept trading touchdowns and it made me super mad. It was a potential implosion again. We were down 17-14 at the end of the first quarter. Somehow, after a shellacking last week, we still hadn’t made any defensive adjustments, and possible-porn-star Zack Zenner ran for 128 yards in the first quarter. ONE HUNDRED AND TWENTY-EIGHT YARDS IN ONE QUARTER. And two touchdown. Some TEAMS don’t even put up those kinds of numbers in an entire game.

 

OMG we are so fucked. If Phil Hansen picked that upset and it became true, everything I know would shatter. By comparison, Ameer Abdullah and Imani Cross combined for 66 yards rushing in the first quarter. Zenner more-than-doubled up our backfield. There were a few miscues on the receiving end of things, too.

(In the end, Kenny Bell should have had two touchdown receptions, but alas, things aren’t always thunderous in afro-land.)

But how the tables can turn. In the second quarter, Abdullah, Cross, and Tommy Armstrong Jr. combined for 97 yards rushing, and Zenner eked out only 41 (less than one-third of the previous quarter!). TAKE THAT, PORN GUY.

Remember how SDSU hadn’t turned the ball over this season? Stanley Jean-Baptiste served up yet another interception, and it was GLORIOUS. That was followed by two more (a fumble recovery, and a pick-six). The Huskers fumbled twice, but in the end that put SDSU at only +10 in the turnover department now! Gotta slowly chip away at these things people!

The onslaught was on, but some people didn’t quite know it yet.

At this point, the Huskers was up 38-17, but apparently there was still hope. This guy’s twitter is plastered in NDSU garb, so I’m not sure why he was also rooting for SDSU. Probably to try to equivocate NDSU to Nebraska when SDSU runs all over them this weekend.

OK, it’s a bit of a cheap shot but not totally unwarranted. I know we had just given up a fumble, but just because your team is up by 40-something points and still trying to run up the score doesn’t give you room to talk. SDSU missed an ensuing field goal and the Huskers scored on their next drive. It should be noted that there were no further tweets regarding SDUSvsNEB after that one.

At this juncture there is no point in further breaking down the game, but there are some positive things to take away:

1. Handsome Ameer is No. 7 in the nation in rushing  after garnering another 139 yards in Saturday’s game. This despite only playing on series in the second half. Imagine if he kept up his production! Tack on another 80+ yards and suddenly he’s No. 3 in the nation. We didn’t put together 215 yards rushing in the first half like I hoped we would, but we got to 163, which is the equivalent to a 76%, so they get a passing grade. The ground game put up 335 yards, more than triple the average the Jackrabbits have been giving up.

2. Stanley Jean-Baptiste is an interception machine. He’s currently leading the nation with four interceptions, and second in interception yards (134). I CAN’T WAIT FOR MORE INTERCEPTIONS THEY ARE THE BEST THING EVER WHEN NEBRASKA IS DOING THE INTERCEPTING.

3. There is/will be no QB controversy, at least for a while. It’s Taylor’s job and everyone knows it. But Tommy Armstrong Jr., Ron Kellogg The Third, and Ryker Fyfe (what a badass name) did their jobs REALLY well. Saturday was the first time the Huskers have ever totaled more than 300 yards passing and rushing in a single game. SO AWESOME. Should Taylor have to sit again, I have full faith in our QBs, but for now he will be the one taking snaps. Also, how cool is it that we have a Ryker Fyfe I, Tommy Armstrong II, Ron Kellogg III, and Johnny Stanton IV as backups? It’s like royalty on these sidelines!

4. Zack Zenner is a beast. Can FCS players win the Heisman? He might make a run at it. Get it? Run, like running back. He put up 202 yards against the Huskers, and he added a 21-yard reception. Granted, 169 of those rushing yards came in the first half, before Nebraska really buckled down. So maybe he’s not that great against semi-funtional defenses.

5. JACKRABBITS BE GONE! RUN AWAY! Memorial Stadium is only big enough for one Jack, and everyone knows exactly who that is. Johnny Stanton IV (another dynamic run/pass QB on the Husker roster – seriously the next three to four years on offense will be grand) showed his support for Jack Hoffman in an awesome way:

Besides, his girlfriend (Miss Nebraska) is smokin’ hot, he’s got more rushing yards this season than MSU, and has more touchdowns than Purdue! She looks a little upset he’s eating all the popcorn, but she needs to maintain that figure anyway.

Enjoy that popcorn Jack, because once you put a ring on it, half of that is hers, maybe more – she looks pretty high maintenance with that crown.

Follow me on twitter at @blackshirtfresh

Preview: Nebraska vs. SDSU

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BannerTo highlight the Husker game this weekend, I had a grand idea of exploiting the confusion between SDSU (South Dakota State University) and SDSU (San Diego State University), but that doesn’t seem fair because SDSU is much better than SDSU. All-time records show Nebraska handily trounced SDSU in something like 1784, their first meeting. The most recent meeting, in 2010, resulted in an SDSU loss (17-3), but the Huskers looked flat.  We can’t do that this time.

Nebraska comes into this game limping after another beating by UCLA and some asshole releasing a tape of Bo Pelini’s 2011 tirade that cursed Nebraska fans. It’s been an emotional week, and the team, while saying they remain steadfast in their focus, has likely heard it all. They are probably exhausted. Like, just-got-home-from-Disneyland-after-eating-a-bunch-of-funnel-cake-and-Dole-pineapple-whip-and-hugging-Goofy tired.

Not only that but… Taylor Martinez will most likely sit out with another case of turf toe. I don’t mean to alarm anyone but SON OF A BITCH, WE NEED TO BATTEN DOWN THE HATCHES, ALL HANDS ON DECK, PULL UP THE DRAW BRIDGE, PUNCH SHIT, LIGHT FIRES. THE GUY THAT WAS SUPPOSED TO WIN THAT TROPHY FOR US IS HURT AND IT’S HIS DAMN TOE AGAIN AND WHO KNOWS IF IT WILL EVER GET BETTER.

Oh god, I’m so nervous. SDSU is good, or so it seems. They have a dynamic running back in Zack Zenner – who may also star as a porn star on some backwoods website with a name like that. He leads the FCS in rushing yards, and since the Huskers can’t stop the run, we may as well just let him walk to the endzone.

SDSU hasn’t turned the ball over this season. I’M TALKING TO YOU, SJB. THIS MEANS YOU, CIANTE. Interceptions. Lots of them. Make them fumble. Our offense could really learn something from these kids. Lets table the turns. They cough it up, we hold on to it. It’s a wonderful strategy. They are +11 in turnovers. We have to fuck this up for them. I will tolerate nothing less than 6 turnovers, in any combination of fumbles and interceptions.

SDSU’s go-to wide receiver is Jason Schneider, a man who is setting career highs in all sorts of categories since the season started. The strategy here is to not let him catch the ball. Then we need to make sure to score touchdowns.

A couple of notes for the week:

1. Bo needs to prove everyone wrong. He should go out there the same as he always does and coach the fuck out of this uber-talented team. There’s not much he could say to a stadium of 90,000+ fans to sway them. If he grabs the mic, it should be one hell of a ride. He might do himself a favor by saying “Fuck you South Dakota State University fans, no one ever even knew you were the state above us. We thought you were just the badlands of North Dakota’s wastewater, seeping ever closer to our Holy Land. We only knew you existed after our 6-ranked team put up only 17 points against you in 2010. Oh boy, you frothing cunts should have heard that recording.”

2. SDSU is giving up more than 400 yards per game. That’s good for us, but not good enough. I’d like to see the Huskers put up 600 to instill confidence. SDSU also is barely giving up 100 yards on the ground. The solution? Give the ball to Abdullah. Theres 100+ right there! Give the ball to Newby. 80 more yards! Give the ball to Imani Cross-the-goaline. POINTS. These gents can run. No FCS defense will hold them to less than 100 yards total. Right? I mean, that doesn’t sound logical. Right? These guys are TANKS. They’ll get it done. 215 yards rushing. In the first half. There’s my call. Don’t make me look bad, boys.

3. Ugh, Jackrabbits. I get it, your state felt the need for two universities and the other one got to pick the name first: the Coyotes. That’s your state animal, and a glorious one at that. So you chose Jackrabbits. You do realize they are in almost every state, right? That’s not unique. They aren’t even threatening. They are scared of EVERYTHING. They run fast, sure, but they run fast away from danger. SDSU couldn’t pick something like the Mountain Lions, Black Bears, or Swift Foxes? ALL indigenous to the state of South Dakota. There were so many options. They could have been the Fringe-Tailed Myotises. Look at these things!

Look at it. It’s so fucking revolting. Those ears. Those teeth. It’s like some mutant rat got all the ugly of his family, grew wings, and developed a tasted for insects and small birds. Thus becoming a Myotis. Bats are scary as shit. They are not fun. Rabbits are fun. Rabbits are cute and cuddly and sweet and like carrots and the like. Bats are hell. They eat living things. They are silent hunters of the night and will eat your ears and toes off while you try to relax in the cool of a summer night with your sweetie and a glass of riesling to accompany your cheese plate. Opposing teams would would be terrified! “SDSU? Nope! No way! Uh Uh! We’ll take the loss. One of them things ate my foot last summer.”

Rabbits run from people, Myotises will eat people. That’s fumble No. 1, SDSU. Prepare for more. For you. You’ll fumble. We won’t (hopefully).

Follow me on twitter at @blackshirtfresh